Today (or, rather, yesterday) I accomplished many things, including: drinking coffee, bathing(!), orgasms, reading Judith Butler, and zineing for (4) hours. Notably, I did not: do my daily drawing, or any required schoolwork.
Also, while I was hunched on my floor smearing on old Elmer's glue so that it curled my A16 (right?!) size zine, I started worrying about the readership of my zine! I started to prepare it for an audience, and worrying about who might compose that audience, and it freaked me the fuck out. I worried about putting in sexual/erotic stuff fer when my parents inevitably read it, and imagined it in a certain J(e)W's hands, and measured my off-the-cuff queer political analysis against more logical thoughts on identity and labels. Fuck. This is where it's really important to be in the moment, right, and not look backward from some future point, right, and I don't want to censor myself or think I'm not good enough or feel like lines are dead as soon as they've crossed my tongue--
I think I feel a small clump of rot coming in on the right side. A'woo! And... Anyone wanna tell me why you do not or do identify with some term for yr sexuality? And...listening to Huggybear at 3am is a bad idea. As is making public writings when really all you should be doing is sleeping.
Also, while I was hunched on my floor smearing on old Elmer's glue so that it curled my A16 (right?!) size zine, I started worrying about the readership of my zine! I started to prepare it for an audience, and worrying about who might compose that audience, and it freaked me the fuck out. I worried about putting in sexual/erotic stuff fer when my parents inevitably read it, and imagined it in a certain J(e)W's hands, and measured my off-the-cuff queer political analysis against more logical thoughts on identity and labels. Fuck. This is where it's really important to be in the moment, right, and not look backward from some future point, right, and I don't want to censor myself or think I'm not good enough or feel like lines are dead as soon as they've crossed my tongue--
I think I feel a small clump of rot coming in on the right side. A'woo! And... Anyone wanna tell me why you do not or do identify with some term for yr sexuality? And...listening to Huggybear at 3am is a bad idea. As is making public writings when really all you should be doing is sleeping.