the rainbow room
Jan. 7th, 2004 08:57 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
starfrostingWhen I got there the lights were already dimmed and a movie was projecting on the projection screen. I didn't see the girl I was supposed to meet, I looked around and tried to pick out the features of all these kids sprawled out on the floor couches and yes beanbags. Cute girl on the couch with sharp eyes and cheekbones but her head's resting on someone's lap and I hook my thumbs through my belt loops and can't believe I can still feel awkward, here, surrounded by queer kids most of whom are probably younger than me. Maybe I'm just awkward cos I'm standing up, don't wanna conspicuously look round to find my friend, don't wanna sit down and seem sister outsider or naught...
When I'd been there a minute I spotted Marlene sitting on a chair toward the back of the room. Marlene's this rad woman who works for Planned Parenthood and organizes this place and makes me grin, sent me absentee ballot in the mail with a sparkly sticker. If I have a mentor no matter how briefly it'd be her. We hug, and talk in that way when small neat words whispered so as not to disturb the film will do to express respect and interest etc.
I remember this summer when I drove myself home from the shore heart pounding. What music was I listening in the car? Probably the mix tape with Team Dresch, summer soundtrack. Ha fucken ha, parents had stumbled upon my queerness and I had to get out out out and it was Wednesday and yeah, I navigated to Doylestown and went in that little room downstairs the Planned Parenthood door rainbow flag hanging small and quiet outside and it was dim in there with all the high school fags and the girls I never quite believed weren't straight. Fucken Rocky Horror on the screen and for the first time I watched it all the way through. Made jokes. My heart stopped pounding its way out my chest cos here I was, and it was fine. Sitting there in shorts and ridiculously short hair and queer in that bisexual way I was then, watching Tim Curry strut around in garters and thinking, here I am. I remember this summer and all the shit, and I think that night made me feel a lot more okay.
ps-the rainbow room is a meetin' place for local queer/questioning youth. weds nights from i think 6 onwards, in the downstairs of the planned parenthood which is on main st. if my horrible street-memory serves me right.
When I'd been there a minute I spotted Marlene sitting on a chair toward the back of the room. Marlene's this rad woman who works for Planned Parenthood and organizes this place and makes me grin, sent me absentee ballot in the mail with a sparkly sticker. If I have a mentor no matter how briefly it'd be her. We hug, and talk in that way when small neat words whispered so as not to disturb the film will do to express respect and interest etc.
I remember this summer when I drove myself home from the shore heart pounding. What music was I listening in the car? Probably the mix tape with Team Dresch, summer soundtrack. Ha fucken ha, parents had stumbled upon my queerness and I had to get out out out and it was Wednesday and yeah, I navigated to Doylestown and went in that little room downstairs the Planned Parenthood door rainbow flag hanging small and quiet outside and it was dim in there with all the high school fags and the girls I never quite believed weren't straight. Fucken Rocky Horror on the screen and for the first time I watched it all the way through. Made jokes. My heart stopped pounding its way out my chest cos here I was, and it was fine. Sitting there in shorts and ridiculously short hair and queer in that bisexual way I was then, watching Tim Curry strut around in garters and thinking, here I am. I remember this summer and all the shit, and I think that night made me feel a lot more okay.
ps-the rainbow room is a meetin' place for local queer/questioning youth. weds nights from i think 6 onwards, in the downstairs of the planned parenthood which is on main st. if my horrible street-memory serves me right.
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no subject
Date: 2004-01-07 06:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-01-07 06:32 pm (UTC)kate my love, this is going to be a night of way too many entries. maybe i should start writing in my real journal instead of this madness...
no subject
Date: 2004-01-07 06:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-01-07 06:41 pm (UTC)maplewood, or, The Infamous Parking Garage!
Date: 2004-01-07 06:43 pm (UTC)